There’s nothing WRONG with Farm Burger, there just isn’t anything particularly RIGHT with it, either. It is exceedingly average, there is nothing extraordinary about it.
Are you someone who views a hamburger as a vehicle for the toppings, or are you someone who sees a burger on a bun – with lettuce, tomato, and pickles or onions – as an end onto itself?
I am a simple man, with simple tastes. I feel that a GREAT burger doesn’t need a lot on top of it. Sure, every now and then, I’ll go crazy and get a burger with bacon, egg, and cheese on it, but I view that as a special treat. I don’t view it as my RIGHT, dammit, to eat a burger like that, or one with avocado, onion rings, barbecue sauce, and bacon, EVERY SINGLE TIME. I don’t feel cheated if my burger doesn’t have a minimum of five toppings on it. But some of y’all do.
So, if you’re a “pile on the toppings” person, then I guess Farm Burger is for you. But, as a simple man, who enjoys the basics, I gotta tell you: their foundation isn’t great. The burger, the bun, and the fries, at a basic level, are nothing to go out of your way for.
Get in me belly!
This place suffers from what I call the “Noah’s Syndrome.” You ever notice how hard Noah’s Bagels works to convince you that you’re in New York? The pictures on the wall, the subway imagery, and throwing all those Yiddish words around, like “shmear” and “egg mit” – all these ways to make you feel like you’ve walked into a shop on the Lower East Side, where real bagels and smoked fish can still be had.
But, you ain’t on the Lower East Side, baby, you’re in frickin’ Noah’s, and their bagels suck. The Noah’s Syndrome is when a store puts more time and energy into creating an atmosphere, trying to persuade you with words and images, than they do with simply making whatever they’re selling – a bagel, a burger, a hot dog – GREAT all on it’s own.
Combo during lunch hours: $8.95 for basic burger, fries, and fountain soda. Reasonable prices!
At Farm Burger, everywhere you look you are being told that the meat is sustainably raised, it’s grass-fed, humanely slaughtered, whatever. ONE WOULD THINK, given all this attention to detail, that the burger – the meat itself – would taste better than burgers at other places. But, one would be mistaken.
Would I eat there again? Sure. Would I go out of my way to eat there? Nope.
And even the fries – while they LOOKED like great fries – were ultimately flavorless. So, until you start piling on the various toppings, and they do give you PLENTY to choose from, you’re dealing with just an average burger joint. And, what I’ve come to learn over the years, is that toppings are a good way to cover up a mediocre product. A great burger can stand on its own, it doesn’t have to hide under a piece of bacon.
HOWEVER … if you have kids, if you are a large group, then this is a good restaurant for you. It’s very open, there’s lots of light, lots of space. Plenty of room for your rugrats to run around. I could definitely see a family of four or more having a good time here, with plenty of options for Mom, Dad, and the little ones. Just don’t expect superior tasting burgers or fries.
Bonus points: they were playing Damien Marley on their PA the whole time I was there. Welcome to Jamrock IS one of my favorite albums of all time. So, kudos for that. (Still, I’d rather the burger be extraordinary and listen to Taylor Swift.)
The fries, like everything else here, were just “OK.” Nothing special.
Farm Burger, 1313 Ninth Street at Gilman
Berkeley, CA 94710
I’ll give them credit: I ordered it MEDIUM, they served it MEDIUM.
